Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize