O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
