I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize