oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
