now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
