u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
