I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
