Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
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