He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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