this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
