I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
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