That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
