butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
