3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Randomize
