Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
