This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
