Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize