Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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