Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Randomize
