I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize