once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
