no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
