It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
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I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
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