I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
