Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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