so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
