I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
should my penis look like a turkey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize