i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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