dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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