In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
we're making bets on your personal life
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
