Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
