I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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