YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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