I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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