I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I am not eating basil off your cock
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize