he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it glows. i had to have it.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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