its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
