i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
The adults are the big ones right?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
