escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
