i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
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