The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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