Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I party with great urgency now.
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