It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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