My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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