Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
