And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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