he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
