We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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