yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
