It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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